By Dr. Wayne W. Dyer

Self-confidence is measured in both the way you feel and the way you behave.

1.  Self-Confidence begins with your attitude.  If you go into a situation with a negative and self-defeating attitude you have destroyed your self-confidence before even going into the act.

2.  Self-Expectations and Self-Confidence go hand in hand.  Start expecting to be effective, to succeed, to see yourself as good as others are.  Don’t put yourself on a lower level.  Don’t worry what others are thinking and see yourself as talented, etc.  If expectations are not met view it as a mistake rather than as a reason to return to your pessimism.

3.  Self-Confidence comes from the self, not others.  If you blame others for your shortcomings, then you are deluding yourself.  You lack self-confidence because you don’t have confidence in yourself, not because others have this attitude.

4.  Competition is not a confidence builder.  If you are always looking over your shoulder to see how you compare with someone else, then that someone else is actually controlling your confidence.  Self-confidence comes from the self.  Look inward for what you want for yourself, and decide on your own personal goals.

5.  The Key to Self-Confidence.  Don’t expect to be successful at every effort.  You don’t have to be perfect in order to have self-confidence.  Every successful person makes mistakes. But take the mistakes as a learning situation.  Stop reviewing your past to look for reasons why you can’t be effective today.  Everything you did until this moment is over, don’t dwell on it.  Give yourself rewards for positive new behavior.  If you know you have accomplished something that was difficult for you to do, then reward yourself.  You need not tell the world, but do remind yourself what a terrific person you are – not because you have succeeded but because you tried.  Stop putting yourself down.  Take one big risk, muster up your courage, and go for a real biggy!